Yes, divine. I live 5 miles away. I don't have to stay here 24/7. I could go home for a few hours everyday. In between meals, he watches TV. Usually, I don't have to help him with that . . . except, now and then, to find a channel. He can usually be left on his own over night. He gets back and forth to the bathroom from the bedroom mostly okay.

People handle bigger demands than this.

I leave him clean clothes in the bathroom. He can change his clothes by himself, if he has to. He did in the nursing home most of the time.

When I'm not depressed, I try to be companionable to him. I google up info about the movies he watches and share that with him. He'll ask who was such and such an actor married to, or when did so and so die and of what? Mostly, I just read things on my tablet computer, while he monopolizes the TV. I figure it's all he has. In the afternoon, I listen to a radio show in the bedroom. My big diversions are going to Walmart's to get groceries . . . or going to the laundomat. I seem to feel best when I talk him into a shower. I like when he's nice and clean.

Today I have fish in the freezer to take out and cook later. And he needs a shower. He cannot do that by himself at all.

That was a fair question, sophiesmom, about what would help. Him saying more nice things would help. Him saying, "Let's take a ride somewhere." would be a change of pace. I used to have him come with me to do grocery shopping. It's much easier for me to just go alone. They don't always have a scooter available.

If he ever said, "This is a lot on you. Are you sure you are up to it?" it would show he considers that I might have a different life I might like to lead. He takes all I do totally for granted. More often than not, he doesn't think of saying that the dinner tasted good.

Well, I'm sure having a pity party for me.

I worry I'll be lonely, if something happens to him.

I know my whole attitude is whiney and immature. Actually, in between these blues episodes, I do fairly okay and show him a good attitude. I don't go around depressed all the time. But I slip into it.

I could do exactly what divine says and notify his care team at the VA. A social worker there told me to just make sure he is wearing his emergency call button (it dials 911) and walk out the door.

Right now I'll go lie down, while he watches car racing shows. The fish later will be good . . . one of my favorites, though not his. I'll bake some cookies, which will make him happy.