I'll be going into work tomorrow because I don't want to leave them in the lurch again (like I did on Friday) but I cancelled Wednesday. I'd have to get up at 3:30 for that shift and that along with the somnolence with falling asleep at the wheel feels like a recipe for disaster. I'll be talking to my mother on the phone (she's on the East coast) during my morning commute tomorrow and hope that keeps me awake.

But I'm getting blood tests on Tuesday and hope to have the results on Wednesday. If it's just the thyroid then I could get meds and have it resolved fairly quickly, if not, then more testing.

I'm afraid I'm screwing myself at work, but I have to take care of myself. I can't do that schedule and that's what's available that day (Wednesday).

I'm still very depressed, but took Seroquel last night and feel slightly better. I don't even know whether to take it on Monday or not, I need it for mood, but am afraid it will make sleepiness even worse. I'm at a loss.

As it is, I have no work the following week because all they had were extremely early schedules which I can't do right now.

Balancing work with mental and physical s*** is horrendous. I need to keep my job, but I need to take care of myself as well. It's a hellish balance.