Full point for 'old man' the Skeezyks. Maybe your husband feels that if the intimacy has to be requested, it's contrived, or 'forced', as he put it. If you want to look him in his eyes then straddle his lap and look into his eyes. You're his wife; if that's what you want from him, you shouldn't have to ask his permission, or 'force' him to look back at you. If he's not comfortable with that intimacy, that's a different issue.