Hello byumetalman: Well... my wife & I have been married for 37 years. And one thing I can say with confidence is that circumstances do change over time. (In our relationship I've become the one who struggles with mental health issues... who knew?) I hate to say it, but the reality is that my wife & I don't really have a lot in common anymore except that we've been married for 37 years. (Her accomplishment, not mine.)

Like you, I'm not into drinking or tattoos either. (Neither is my wife.) But there are some ways in which I could well be doing some things that would be as difficult for my wife as the things your wife is doing are for you... perhaps more so. (I'll spare you the details.) In my case, I simply chose not to pursue them.

Of course these are the kinds of things couples sometimes seek couples counseling for, if that is something you & your wife would consider. Beyond that, perhaps you may want to consider seeking some individual counseling / therapy for yourself in order to figure out what you feel you must do about this situation. From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though your wife is going to do what she's going to do. And you're correct. She is her own person & has the right to do as she sees fit. But you also matter. And so, it is going to be incumbent on you to decide how much of this you can tolerate & what you feel you must do about it. The unfortunate thing is sometimes couples just grow apart. That's about all I can say...