Hi everyone, mind if I cry here for a moment?

I don't want to blabber too much with the story. I just feel sad, forgotten, and am crying.

I was doing homework and now I'm too low to even concentrate anymore.

I opened my heart to him and he just said it might be all in my head. And then changed the subject.

I don't know what to believe.

Why does he choose games over me, every time?

How come we only joke around and not have a meaningful conversation?

I dunno. I wonder if I'm the bad guy.

But for now, I just want to cry away these feelings for a bit. Maybe it was a bad idea to decide to date. I'm starting to not trust anyone anymore. Such a high divorce rate, such hatred and shallowness floating around social circles.

I just want to drive off with my dog and go on an adventure. I feel better thinking about that.

I try to have my own life apart from it, but I seriously miss it when he's not a part of it. He's always so distant and does only the bare minimum to keep the relationship afloat.

When I bring it up, he seems so naive and completely clueless. Like this is how all relationships are.

But I love him! I don't want to give this relationship up. He's not some toy I'm using only as long as he benefits me. He's a person with feelings and a life, and I still want him to be happy. If only I knew the right words to say to him. Or the right choices to make.