You're being too hard on yourself.
I mean, look at you! You're working FULL time. Even people 100% healthy often struggle in the rat race. We spend 75% of our time at work so as far as I'm concerned you're winning in this game of life, . Also, you don't hate your job. You like it. You're really lucky!

I think you should try and pursue a hobby. It doesn't need to be anything spectacular like cliff jumping. Joint a gaming group. Reading group. Running.

I think you just need a little something to give you that second wind when you get home from work.

You'll be OK, . Update us! X0X0