Hi,
No thanks are required. I wish sometimes when I am doing interpretations, I could wave a magic wand and make people not so scared and to be happy. However, that's not why we are here.

On my website there are numerous resources you can also peruse to see if any of them resonate for you. However, I "Feel" that you might want to check out some older books written by an entity called "Silver Birch" during the last century through a man called Maurice Barbanelle.

During the war years Maurice went as a reporter to a spiritual circle to report on it. At the end he felt like he woke up and asked what had happened? It turns out he had gone into a trance and brought through this entity called Silver Birch, a native american indian.

Over subsequent years, Silver Birch wrote several books through Maurice. Thinking of your struggles with your pain brought this to my mind...

"Life is always a polarity. If there were no darkness there would be no light. If there were no trouble there could never be any peace. If the sun always shone you would not appreciate it. You have to learn sometimes through conditions that seem a nuisance. One day you will look back and say, "We learned our best lessons not when the sun was shining, but when the storm was at its greatest, when the thunder roared, the lightning flashed, the clouds obscured the sun and all seemed dark and hopeless". It is only when the soul is in adversity that some of its greatest possibilities can be realised."

"Pain and suffering are regarded as miseries; they are not. They have divine parts to play in the evolution of the individual."

"When you had those experiences you may have thought that life was bitter and harsh and unkind, that you were forgotten, or lonely or neglected, and fate had dealt you a very hard blow. But the soul grows through adversity and the pure gold emerges after the processes of crushing and refining have taken place."

"We can never promise that your life will be free from problems, perplexity, or even pain. We can promise that within yourself you will find the means to overcome all handicaps and disabilities. As you strive to express the highest, the deepest, the greatest within yourself, so you will attract to your aid those beings from our world who love you, who desire to help you, and through you help others."

"Grief, sorrow, sickness and suffering are part of the means by which the children of earth are taught the greatest lessons. If truth were to be found with ease, it would not be appreciated. It is because truth comes in the hour of greatest sorrow or suffering that value is placed upon it by the one who is ready to receive. Trite though is may sound, you cannot obtain truth until you are spiritually ready."

Hope this helps you.

With kind regards,
Guy