Quote:
Originally Posted by shezbut
 i'm sorry that your relationship has come to an end. 
Do you know what has made you paranoid and jealous, to start? Perhaps if you worked on that aspect of yourself, you'd win him back in the process? It is very hard. Gentle hugs to you! |
Thank you =/
I so dearly did not want this relationship to end. 2 years a wonderful future lost because he couldnt handle my jealousy for the passed 4 months. Like I said, though, I was very hard on him and cant really blame him.
My jealousy stems from my first real relationship where he cheated on me physically and emotionally. That was when I was 19. I also have some traits of Borderline Personality.
Im at a loss here because so so deeply, I want my relationship to grow stronger from this and to stay with him, I know that my jealousy will never fade. Its not fair to him. Its also not fair to me to torture myself with it all the time.
I have been taking steps to raise my self esteem but Im not sure if I will ever feel secure in a relationship. Its my cross to bear. Im okay, and I understand why it happened but I'm still terribly heart broken.