Sounds like emotional abuse to me. I don't blame you for not wanting someone to speak to you this way. Whether his expectations or too high or not he needs to be respectful. If he can't do that I would have to leave. I spent 24 years in a marriage like that and it took it's toll on me emotionally and physically so I don't advise anyone to put up with it. He needs to go to couples counseling with you and if he is not willing then he loses.