Well, I think that question might have different meanings depending on when it was posed. But, in general I think that it might mean using the time for yourself instead of thinking you had to throw it away? (wasting it?)

Once T said to me, "Why do you come in here and perform? Why bother? I said I was tired. He said, "If I were tired and I went to therapy I'd just lay on the couch."

I think the point was the same because at that moment I was just blathering nonsense and not getting to the crux of anything.

The time in therapy is so short and the pressure on that we put on ourselves to make every second count is so intense. So, what I try to do now when I hit those moments is to just tell T what I'm feeling - like you did. How could you have embraced that time instead of throwing it away? How could you have stayed in those moments with T? What would you have said/done to be close for those minutes?