I, too, feel guilty when I am depressed about my parenting. I'm afraid I'm completely ****ing up my son. Besides that, I worry that he has inherited this awful illness and will suffer. I feel like I should have never had kids but at the time I thought I had been cured (just a really long remission). And there's no going back now. So I just do the best I can, fight as hard as I can. In the end your kids will learn to appreciate all you did do instead of focusing on what you didn't do. I know I did with my mom.