Quote:
Originally Posted by catlover21
My grandmother died Tuesday. I was able to tell her good bye privately before she passed and I believe she heard me. We were very special to each other because we're the only ones in the family with a mental illness, bipolar disorder. Unfortunately my anxiety prevented me from going to the funeral. I feel peace with her spirit but guilt for not being there for my mother. Any thoughts on grief or death?
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I'm so sorry for your loss, catlover. She DID hear you. (This was something that particularly caught my eye for having had the situation with my own grandmother over 20 years ago -- in a coma shortly before they turned the life support off) Even in a coma, even if not being able to make the least movement, hearing persists. I don't know your exact circumstances of course, but wanted to let you know that even in worst state, she would hear you.
I hope that gives you comfort.
As far as thoughts on grief, the most basic is to be gentle with yourself. Banish the word "should". It is personal. This is YOUR journey through it. Do be prepared for unexpected waves. They are ok, and totally normal. It will be ok. It just takes time.