I felt that way too with the guy years ago, I didn't know what would have happened if we had met again, and a big part of me wanted it. The fact is the more you fantasise about someone, the more if it ever happens it will be a disappointment anyway. Think of this guy realistically. If he is willing to put his children through a potential disruption at home if his wife ever discovered he was having an affair he's not worth it, not to mention the pain he would cause his wife. I know children often blame themselves for marital problems. They should be his priority. Remember he was the one that suggested you hang out, you have done nothing wrong. It's normal to feel guilty though, it means you have a conscience and it stops you from going there. But in reality as long as it's just in your head there's nothing to feel bad about.

I know it's hard to forget someone, I'm trying right now, but try not to cyber stalk him or look him up, that won't help. The only way to detox from someone is to totally cut off any connections or potential contact with them. I only wish I could take my own advice, lol.

It doesn't matter if he would or wouldn't have an affair with you, he's off limits.