It is 96 days till my best friends wedding and I haven't made any strides in my physical appearance. I need to lose 65 lbs to look decent. I hope. I need to do it. Last wedding I was so hurt about my appearance, loneliness, and situation. I need to get going. But I don't want to be in the same place I was the last wedding I attended. I also missed a wedding cause of how I look. I know looks aren't everything but I avoid pictures windows and mirrors cause I hate how I look. I still see myself muscular and fit. I don't want to cry about this. I need to hit the gym hard and some some diet food. Their is no way I'm returning to the amount of pain I had 2 years ago or even my sui attempt. I'm not returning to that. I'm gonna show them how great I can be.