My first therapist traumatized me in this respect. He told me I was in love with him. I have no idea where he got that idea. He's the first person I really tried to be 100% me with. It was devastating and left shrapnel throughout my psyche. Because of that, I have been super hyperaware of anything I did that might possibly indicate any kind of attachment. I didn't say thank you to therapists for like 7 years of therapy with 9 or so therapists. Of course, most of them weren't helpful or caused destruction themselves, so there wasn't much positive to compliment on, but I'm naturally gifted at seeing good in others, so even with those therapists there were things I wanted to say thank you for. I didn't. I was too scared they'd tell me I was too attached or something.

With my current therapist, I didn't say thank you until two years in, and even then, I was really, really scared that he would throw his hands up and say, "Wow, that's enough, girl you're way too intense and too attached, leave."

In the year since then, I've said thank you a few more times. I sent him an email this week (which was an assignment). I couldn't figure out what to say, so I said thank you and told him the two ways he has helped me most. This session, he said, "Wow. That was so kind. Just really, really nice. It left me kind of stunned. In this field, you don't get much back [meaning clients don't put positive energy towards the therapist, or something like that], so that was really nice to read."

I think if a therapist is really helpful, it is nice to tell them that. Like someone else said, saying "this was really helpful" can give them an indication of how to keep helping us most effectively.