Why is your friend telling you things that hurt you? I wonder if your mother is playing into the friendship, knowing what she says will be relayed. Could be helpful for you if you find a different way to communicate with her.

I hope you'll decide to go tonight jinny. Go and let it happen and see how it goes; leave when you feel ready.

I was invited recently to a gathering last night. I wanted to go, but had a huge meltdown Thursday night that resulted in many phone calls to T and calls back from her that night and next morning. I kept thinking about this social event. (I rarely go out besides work). I decided that I was using the meltdown as a way to avoid the social event so I chose to not allow that. I also thought about how other people live their lives, and thought of one person particularly who would say at such a time, "I NEED this party!".

So, I decided I was going to be like this person, like 'some people' and go no matter what, leave if it was too uncomfortable or I just wanted to be home. It worked out for me. It was okay; I enjoyed it in spite of the meltdown the night before, the puffy eyes, the feeling exhausted.

So, since it worked okay for me, I want to encourage you to go tonight in spite of all the valid and understandable feelings you're having.