It is hard to have that feeling isn't it? The feeling of not knowing what exactly you have, or what the solution is. I seem to have recurring patterns of questioning my diagnosis and treatment, most often when I'm on the down. Lately I've just felt over-medicated and kinda flat, which isn't good either, but it's better than being ultra-volatile and violent.

I have BP II and BPD Meds and therapy have been helpful. But it is a never-ending fight. You're not alone and I hope you can get the help you need. PC is a good place for info and support.