SheHulk07 - I'm sorry that you're feeling disconnected, that's a really tough one to deal with. I think I understand, I have sometimes went back and looked up old Ts. Sometimes just to see what they're up to, and to sort of mentally reconnect as well.

Are you working towards finding a new T1?

I wouldn't worry too much about googling your old Ts, unless it becomes obsessive and gets in your way of getting other things done. It's all public info, and it doesn't hurt them in any way.

Good luck... I hope you can find a good new T!