Hello Carl: Honestly... I don't know what to tell you about this. (By the way let me mention that, although I am an old man now, I was also an only child; & my mother was also very attached to me. So I have some perspective with regard to the situation you're in.) From what you wrote it sounds to me as though you are in an impossible situation. Your mom has one set of priorities, so to speak, & your gf has another set. And the two are pretty-much diametrically opposed! Plus you, for your part, don't want to give up either.

I guess where you & I differ is that I grew tired of my mother's clinging. And when I had the opportunity to move out of state, I took it & seldom looked back. It was unfortunate. But it was the way it had to be. So, from my perspective, I'd have to say that, at some point or other, you're simply going to have to choose. Otherwise the choice will, in one way or another, be made for you. As the old saying goes... you can't serve two masters.

I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!