this reminds me of something that still kind of confuses me to this day. i started seeing my current psychiatrist in 2003. i don't recall way back then what all i said to her or if i mentioned dissociation and other parts. for years, i was scared to say anything about the others to her for fear she wouldn't believe me. but when going through a few records i had from her (not sure why i had them), in one letter to another doctor, it mentioned possible DID in 2003. when i read that, it shocked me because i still have no idea how she came to that conclusion, and over these last few years i did not say much to her about the others and she didn't outright ask me either because she wanted me to tell her when i was ready, if ever.

when i finally did start talking about the others to her, i was freaked out and still thought she wouldn't believe me because i somehow forgot she already knew even without knowing much about the others. it still is so strange to me. and it still is weird for me to talk about the others with her, but it has also been a relief because i don't have to censor myself anymore and can say whatever without it confusing either of us since i worked so hard to try to keep things together and hidden...or so i thought...i don't know. i sometimes still feel like i won't be believed or maybe she'll think i am making it up...but so far that hasn't happened...