Back in the dark. Asked nurses for help but they kept saying they were busy. What could be more f**** important that talking me down from suicide???? Send me wild again. I was going to run away again but instead complained in detail, crying to my eyes out and raging against the stupid system that stops nurses doing their job. I was angry that they hadn't come to see how I am today after last nights dramas.

The nurse was kind an apologetic and acknowledged they had failed me. I told him it was a miracle I wasn't dead. Feeling abandoned and let down are big triggers for me. I'm crying now. I want to live but feel compelled in the opposite direction. Nurses promised they would watch me now as they hadn't been before as they were supposed to. He also gave me meds to calm me down.

I really hope I see my dr soon. I need help!