Have you done any mindfulness meditation? I'm thinking in particular of 'observing' exercises. Exercises where you do stuff like imagine that your thoughts / feelings / sensations are in these little carts that chug along in front of you (into your attention... then out of your attention). I'm thinking that those exercises help us gain control of our attention such that we can OBSERVE our emotions, thoughts, and sensations WITHOUT REACTING TO THEM.

Could help?

(I need to do more of these too because I have a heightened startle reflex that I find embarrassing sometimes... And also because I have very obvious emotional expressions. Would like to have better control...)