It is great that you were able to talk to him about this... Er... Did you ask him what it was about? Is it that he is experiencing loss of desire or inability to achieve an erection or that once it comes then it goes or quite what is going on?

> I don't think he'd turn me down if I got him started.

So it is just that he isn't initiating things how he once was?

> When I said that he spoils me he said he felt so bad about not being able to perform.

If it is about erectile dysfunction (which most men experience at SOME point) then... Well... Sometimes it can help to be a bit creative about sex. Often we think of sex as a 'goal oriented' activity where the whole point is for one (usually the guy) or both to orgasm. But... There can be nice pleasurable things to do that aren't so goal oriented. Sometimes... The pressure of feeling like one needs to achieve the goal can actually be counter-productive... Things like massage or manual stimulation or just gentle stroking / petting or kissing etc can be quite pleasurable even if neither 'achieve' orgasm. Often... Once the pressure comes off... Then the fun returns :-) Often... We have a view of sexual activity that is quite phallicentric too (hence LOTS of performance anxiety)... Variety can be the spice of life...

Sometimes... The rate of sex that we have in a fairly new relationship is something that can't really be sustained long term. Once or twice a week is fairly good (with respect to long term). Sometimes people are happy with less... But really... It is about mutual happiness as much as possible. It is possible that... The rate that you guys were having is simply unsustainable long term and his body is starting to poop out on him a little. Quality rather than quanitity perhaps ;-)