I've checked the perimeter of my house a couple times tonight. I feel like I need to do it again. All of the anti-anxiety medications aren't working so that begs the question: Is this actually anxiety or is there actually something wrong. I don't know what and I don't know why, but I really feel like something bad is going to happen. I feel like I have to be ready for it, or something. Damn, I wish I still had my gun.
I feel like I need to check my windows and doors again. I don't know why. I'm posting this on here because I know PTSD can increase paranoia. I don't think I'm going to get any sleep. If I fall asleep, something could happen. I really hate this. I don't know if what I'm feeling is real or if I'm just crazy. I just wish I could feel safe but I can't. Not unless someone's awake watching over the house. I know all too well how easy it is to break into a house this old and I'm not falling asleep to allow anyone to break in here.

I sound so insane right now.... Why am I so damn paranoid and why aren't the anti-anxiety pills working?