Hello PumpkinPieHead: I'm so sorry you are dealing with so many trying situations... and all at the same time. Any one of them, by itself, could be enough to weigh a person down. I assume I don't need to tell you that what is important to do here is to reach out, in real life, for the help you need... even if it involves simply calling a crisis hotline to begin with. Please try to persevere during this difficult period. From what you wrote, it sounds as though better days are in sight at least with some, if not all of your present circumstances. I send hugs your way with the hope that you might be able to find deep peace within...