If you saw someone else post this (me, Fuzzy or whoever) would you agree that it was that person's fault that all of this is happening?
I know it's difficult to see beyond what the veil allows. You know I do and you've helped me through many nights when it was at it's worse. That's not a weak person. A person who had this coming wouldn't be able to set aside their own thoughts to help a friend like how you've helped me. Hell, they wouldn't consider doing it. You're a good man who doesn't deserve this and you sure as hell aren't weak for feeling this way. To carry this burden, I think if anything, that makes you strong. Stronger than you realize.