You, and no one else for that matter, will ever be happy when you spend your life comparing yourself to someone else. Ever.

you can't force charisma really. You can become more charismatic but it has to be genuine - and I don't think you genuinely want to be, you just want to be "better". Which you pretty much state in your second option.

As I've said before - none of us here can actually comment on you, your coworkers, girls at the gym, or your brother... You have such extreme views and opinions of everyone in your life that the only thing we can be fairly sure on is that you're giving us an exaggerated black-and-white description. This is how therapy could help you - a therapist could help you break down some of that black and white thinking.

Now, as you seem to claim some desire for self-improvement.... Here is what I've seen and learned about you from your posts. I am not going to restate your own self-assessments because I have no idea how accurate they are. I am only going to share my own observations and opinions. Again - as I do not know you and only have your extreme black and white thinking to go off of, it's a bit difficult and who knows how accurate or inaccurate I am.

1) you have very low self-esteem
2) you are very shallow- the only positive you share about yourself is that you are youthful and attractive.
3) you seem to care more about being idolized than anything more genuine
4) you've got a contradictory belief that you're better than everyone but also worse than everyone
5) you mind-read others and are quite convinced/paranoid about what other people think about you - and you've yet to share any concrete examples that prove your thoughts.
6) you've expressed a lot of hate and jealousy towards everyone in your life
7) it seems like you are quite fake in your behaviour around others - you say they all say you are nice but I've never heard you share anything nice about what you do
8) you ignore or get aggressive towards people on the forum

Based on these things and others, I can say that yep, I wouldn't like you very much at all. Those sorts of views come out over time even when you try to suppress them.

I'm sure you are going to either ignore me or get aggressive as that tends to be your pattern. And yet, I keep responding to you. I respond out of a genuine concern for you even though responding in many ways feels like a waste of my time and effort.

Being genuine is a lot more important than being shallowly charismatic. I am both genuine and charismatic when I'm in social situations - being charismatic was a natural trait of mine but it got squashed down due to being treated poorly st home, but I've became more natural to myself over the years.

The people I tend to become closest with are the ones who value me being genuine as opposed to people interested in my charisma.