I just had my session this morning and went in with a bunch of stuff that is not working for me in therapy with this therapist. I asked her if she could compromise on anything and she said that she couldn't. I was always of the opinion that I was supposed to be comfortable in therapy and if she can't meet me halfway on ANY of the 5 things than I need to look for someone else and that makes me very sad. Although, I feel more ready than ever before to either take a long break or look for someone else.

Here are the things that I brought up:

1. I want to have some type of rapport with her on anything so that when I walk into therapy that we don't have to just dive into it can ease into it. I can't stand how she just says, "Where would you like to begin?"

2. I don't like the blank slate and I can't understand why she won't answer basic questions that you could ask any cashier, clerk or random person and they'd answer.

3. I want her to help keep me accountable to work projects that just don't get done. She refuses to follow up on anything and wants me to bring it up. I could have open heart surgery and she would not ask me how it went.

4. I asked if she'd walk me to the door after our sessions as I don't like her staring at me while I get my stuff together. It is so awkward since it's not like we can have some chit chat to take the focus off of me a little.

5. I asked her if she can ever say something nice, like give a compliment once in a blue moon, but she doesn't do that either.

What frustrates me the most is that she responded saying that we need to talk more about it and why all of this is important to me. I do NOT want to spend weeks talking about our relationship. We spend far more time talking about how we relate than about my actual problems! I don't think that it's a good use of time, doesn't meet my goals etc....

So, I know that if I'm not happy and if she's not going to change that I need to look for someone else. I'm afraid that I might not find someone else that is as present as she is, she never yawns, looks at the clock, never takes notes or paints her nails is always on time and is very consistent and most of all she's very non-judgemental and very easy to talk to which is huge! I know that those are all good things! While I absolutely do not like the blank slate approach I do NOT want a new T to be an open book, I just want her to know some basic info about her.

So 2 questions....do you think that it's time to move on or do you think that I have a great therapist and should just drop all of the things that are bothering me? And have you ever been in a situation where the therapy is far more about the therapeutic relationship than the actual problems in life?

I would appreciate some support or encouragement here. Thanks in advance.