So this is an excerpt from my original post, "What frustrates me the most is that she responded saying that we need to talk more about it and why all of this is important to me. I do NOT want to spend weeks talking about our relationship. We spend far more time talking about how we relate than about my actual problems! I don't think that it's a good use of time, doesn't meet my goals etc...."

Maybe what I should have written is spending time talking about our LACK of relationship. To be clear, I'm not looking for a full fledged relationship/friendship or anything like that. I just want to have a rapport with her on something simple like travel, TV shows or sports etc.... Just something to chit chat about when we start off the sessions and when we end since it's so uncomfortable as it is now. However, I also want to know just a little bit of her background like where she's from, if she is married, has kids etc...and since she won't answer those types of questions, I just randomly asked if she liked pizza which I do NOT care if she does or not, I just wanted her to tell me something/anything! I got frustrated about her not engaging with me on anything and when she left me a message to change my appointment time she said, "I know that you had a lot of feelings come up in our last session so let's just keep talking about them." So you can call it talking about our relationship or lack of relationship. Hope this helps make things clearer. Thanks again everyone!

PS: I was confiding in a colleague/friend of mine about how tough therapy has been and my colleague gave me a glowing recommendation of her therapist who is NOT a blank slate and said that I should make an appointment with her. I thought that she was just saying it but this morning she emailed me all of of the contact info for her therapist.

I called thinking I could leave a message on her machine and she answered! I was so caught off guard. I spoke to her briefly and she said that as long as I have a flexible schedule which I do, that she could see me. She asked me to email her because she was driving and also mentioned that she didn't think that she has any appointments until the 2nd week of December which I said was fine because I wasn't in a crisis. Also turns out that she takes my insurance! I'm trying to be cautiously optimistic and will keep everyone posted.