It's been over a week since posting, "My Best Friend Lost". I'm having a terrible time coping with this. He went from calling me almost every other day to once a week. Texts have decreased from everyday to maybe every 4. His messages aren't as they use to be. Today was most hurtful. He just texted "Happy Thanksgiving" ending with a fall leaf emoticon. As if I am some sort of an acquaintance and not such a close friend. I know this may seem like nothing. But it broke my heart even more. The person I knew would've called to tell me of his plans and ask me of mine. How can someone cut all emotions off they had for a person in a matter of a couple months? How can your best friend be so cut and dry after more than a year of tenderness? All bc he has a gf. I have confronted him about his absence. Although he says that just because we don't communicate as much doesn't mean I mean less. Well.... I'm sorry. The friendship we had and how we were was the ingredient for its strong foundation. That, I feel, is nonexistent. Actions speak louder than words. Especially when those actions were put into practice for more than a year.
This is so frustrating for me and beyond comprehension. I'm mourning this loss. It is almost unbearable and physically hurts. He doesn't seem to get this. Why? How could someone who was so close change? If he cared so much about me, he'd try all he could to prove to me that he did.
Everyday that passes, I feel like I'm going to explode from this pain. Yes we are friends as we were. Before this new girl, he would've showed me how much our friendship meant. In fact, if someone was to tell me he would treat me this way, I would never believe them - with all my heart. He doesn't seem to understand why I am so deeply hurt. I'm more hurt by the fact that a month or so ago, it would've hurt him to know he had caused me any pain. He would've called me to talk about it. He would've given me what I needed to feel as special as I had before. He wouldn't want to lose me. Now it seems he truly doesn't care whether I'm in his life. He promised he'd never allow his sig other to come between any of his friends - me in particular. Yet how could they even object to me being a part of his life when I am no longer? Is he this clueless or this besotted with her, that his better judgement has become blurred?
I cry everyday. The last I spoke with him, I told him I was tired of staying in the past. I cared too much for our friendship to let this get in the way. I wanted to leave things in a state of resolution - although things are not as I suffer in silence. He is dead to me. It seriously feels as if I've lost my friend through his death.
I just want what we had. But he denies anything has changed - a person who had so much insight about people. He claims I am choosing to see our friendship in this light. I am only reacting to his mistreatment. Is he even mistreating me? Did he forget how close we were. How can I get him back? Do I want him back? Was he even my friend to begin with or did he only need me when he needed me. Now he doesn't need me anymore. I just can't handle this unexpected rejection.
Please help...