Last night I was angry and wanted to stop taking meds, thinking I must have been misdiagnosed. It's easier to stay in denial than to face the reality that this disorder is going to plague me for the rest of my life. My infection is not healing and I can't help but blame it on bipolar disorder destroying everything in its path, including my immune system. I still feel possessed. And I'm angry. So angry. If it weren't for the depression side of this mixed episode, I might have killed myself in a fit of rage already. But the depression is almost the voice of reason in this sinister mind, subduing me.