Quote:
Originally Posted by Só leigheas
Better but I'm now dealing with the aftermath of everything. Some things that were said makes it difficult to offer forgiveness. I'm just trying to let it go, right now through this site and writing. Just channel it into music like I've done before.
I'm just trying to understand why I keep going back and I why I even love some of these people, or maybe just the idea of loving them. I'm just upset with myself for letting them get under my skin.
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I think it's just part of our CPTSD. I've found that the least little hurtful things, that wouldn't usually bother me that bad, can be magnified in my head to "Alert, Alert Will Rogers!" I get defensive and the anger and hate will focus on that person. What I'm saying is that people will say and do things that are really not that big of a deal, but I perceive them as major things and it wears me down. I need to learn how to say to myself that ..so and so is an idiot and don't waste my time and energy on them. Let karma take care of them.
We all have our ways of dealing with these things, writing and music are two good ones. Feel better, and don't let these people steal your time and occupy your mind.