My mind feels fractured into millions of pieces. You know how our brains tell us certain things are alike and other things aren't? Like if you have a book, you can expect a certain shape and maybe typeset and other common features with other books. My mind seems unable to recognize things as in common with each other. Each book stands out as a singular object. Which makes a bookcase full of books a container of unique objects... I just can't look at it. My brain is trying to process a million things at once, all these features that it should see as common but now sees as singular. It's unbearable to be awake and interacting with the world. I can't read. Can barely write this.*I want to throw things and scream, but I can hold back.*

What is happening to me? I'm sleeping a lot so I'm not manic. Is it possible to start having manic symptoms before sleep symptoms? The last time I felt this way I was in a mixed episode same time last year.