Quote:
Originally Posted by MBM17
IT WAS SUCH A RELIEF!!!!!!!
My initial depression diagnosis was hard but I had to face reality because I was almost suicidal. I felt weighed down to have a label. I was sure that everyone could see.
Each additional diagnosis was a little less upsetting.
The BPD diagnosis was a shocker and really, really hard. I mean, it seemed to fit, but it just caused me this personal agony. It was weird. It was also incorrect.
I'd had so many diagnoses by the time I got the right one that getting my bipolar diagnosis a year and a half ago was A MIRACLE!!!!!! As soon as I found out the bipolar 2 diagnosis, I was so relieved. Finally everything made sense. Finally I understood why I got all those other diagnoses - they were all just about one piece of the bipolar. The BPD was about the bipolar rapid cycling. The depression was the depressive episodes of bipolar. The anxiety and insomnia were the manic side of bipolar.
I've felt PEACE about my diagnosis for the first time.
And I finally started getting better!!! They kept putting me on the wrong meds due to the wrong diagnosis, so I wasn't getting better. Once I got the right diagnosis, they put me on the right meds, and I had the first happy time I could ever remember.
That's how I feel about diagnoses now. I'm really grateful for mine. That's why I have periods of happiness in my life now.
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Can I ask how you ended up getting the bipolar II diagnosis? Was it from a psychiatrist or therapist? I ask because I'm pretty convinced I have bipolar II, but a couple p-docs have doubted it. My T thinks it might be possible, and my marriage counselor says the actual diagnosis doesn't matter (which I disagree with!).
I have generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, recurrent major depressive episodes, and OCD. I know the OCD would be its own thing, but as I've read about bipolar II, it seems like it fits me better than the first three. Like first depressive episode in my late teens, panic attacks that last longer than they normally would in panic disorder, and insomnia. It seems like the p-docs were hung up on regular mania symptoms rather than hypomania. And I feel like I definitely have recurrent hypomania symptoms, particularly the irritability and inability to focus. Just want someone to actually believe me!