I'd love to hear from anyone who has dealt with emotional abuse from a partner and left the relationship.

A lot of emotional abuse takes place indoors, away from everyone else's view. From the outside, everything looks fine because Abusers know how to behave in front of others.

I left my ex over 6 months ago. This person verbally abused me periodically for a number of years. In bad fights she would erupt into a tirade of verbal abuse and said horrible things to me, manipulated me. Afterward, she would apologize and acknowledge she was 'out of control' but then blame me for 'driving her crazy'. She was also controlling and manipulative in everyday ways, wronging me for the slightest things. Putting me on the defensive for how I dress, when I had a drink, how I would spend my money, or what I would choose NOT to spend it on, when I had dirt on my shoes, when I was out a little longer than I said I would be, how I slept ...etc. I still have her words in my head and I am still recovering from her abuse but of course, the thing is nobody else saw it.

I never talked about it to others while I was in the relationship but I have tried to talk about it since and I'm still finding it hard to talk about with my friends, especially the ones we have in common. When I do talk about it or make any passing reference to it, I feel like they all get quiet. or worse, they question my experience. I had one person actually ask me what qualified emotional abuse over just 'fighting'. I feel like there's an air of "just get over it." They don't want to engage or inquire about my feeling in the conversation and it hurts. My own Mother told me 'to take the hight road' because she feared that I would be the one who looked like the drama queen.

I have said, and I almost mean it, that I wish she had hit me physically instead. For some reason, physical abuse is so much easier for other people to understand. If she had hit me, kicked me, punched me. Nobody would be silent when I tried to talk about it. Nobody would be inviting her to parties that I'm expected to attend. Nobody would question why I don't want to be around her and will not be in the same room wit her ever again.