thanks for the encouragement. I am getting that book tomorrow. The thing that is distressing me is that I am letting this affect my self-esteem. I feel like a loser because I am fighting, can't resolve it, feel like he has me over a barrel. I feel helpless. I don't have family I can turn to. Sometimes it's hard to deal with this stuff on one's own. I feel like giving up ... but I can't just throw my career down the toilet. I feel powerfless ... christ, it just feels like if you don't have a family on your side, you're emotionally and socially crippled for life.