You've made great progress. Might not seem that way because it's taking time, but the important part is that it's forward motion.

Not sure what kind of environment you're in, but I'm in an urban one and I can't speak highly enough of MeetUp. When I moved back to the area after some time away, I found that my old network of friends sprang a few leaks. They're essentially good people but they aren't reliable when we make plans, so I decided to work on making new acquaintances and MeetUp has been very helpful for that. There is one group of "urban explorers" that has a bunch of regulars and just getting to know them has made a huge impact on my quality of life. While my other groups can be hit or miss depending on what the focus is, I've met people through some of them, too.

I've found that it's just good to get out and take the focus off my own life and problems for a little while. It helps me keep perspective. When you spend a lot of time alone, it can change your perceptions, especially perceptions of yourself as you get deeper and deeper into your own head and problems. For me, it made me feel inconsequential. I know people care about me, but it's hard to actually feel that love when you don't see them very often.

And yeah, social skills are like muscles: You need to use them to keep them strong. But most of all, getting out and meeting new people gives me a chance to "start fresh." They don't know all the things I've been through. They just know me as one of the long-term residents of the area who sometimes points out interesting tidbits about this historic building or that landmark and occasionally says something that cracks everyone up. When I step back and try to see myself as they seem to see me, it's a good reminder, like, "They see this interesting/witty side of me because it actually exists. I'm not just work stress, financial problems, and scabbed-over wounds. I'm more than that."

And whatever issues you might be facing, you're more than that, too. It takes a lot of strength to go from not being able to leave the house to getting out and about. It also takes guts to come on here and talk about having issues with self-esteem. I pretty much only lurk here because I feel a certain amount of shame over some of the messes I managed to get myself into, but I had to respond to your post because I believe I have an inkling of what you might be going through and I wanted to offer some encouragement. It seems to me that your're on the right track. It takes time, but it's progress, so don't give up!