((((depressme)))) i don't know what you do for a living, but it doesn't sound like they're being supportive to you. your work seems to be creating a conflict with you that may be making it difficult for you to take care of yourself effectively.

years ago, i tried holding down jobs (one at a time, of course). but, i was too exhausted on my down-time that i couldn't take care of myself at all. it wasn't even worth it, so i had to go on disability. i haven't been able to hold down a job in many years. i understand how hard it is.

last, but not least, i'm very sorry for your loss.