This post is about a conversation I had with a friend this afternoon.

We were talking about workplaces and I said I was happy at the level I was working at (min wage basic job) and he said that was okay but that if I wanted to I was capable of much more and that I'm intelligent.

This friend has said before he thinks I'm intelligent, I used to volunteer for him (in social care sector) and he says he learned a lot (people skills) from me.

I am not particularly intelligent/bright. I get by. I scraped through school exams, did not go to uni, and haven't made a career. I work hard at what I do but my job is basic and does not require intelligence.

So I replied that I wasn't really intelligent. He disagreed. Then he asked if I was fishing for compliments which really threw me. I wasn't, I was just being honest.

I have many intelligent friends (including said friend), an intelligent husband, a bright son, they are quick thinkers and achievers - but I'm not. I'm okay with that, it doesn't mean I'm not worthy - I know I deserve self-compassion, and I am capable of many useful things, I'm just not the brightest.

I'm not sure why it matters so much to me that he thinks I'm denying my intelligence, maybe it's my sense of self (or possibly I'm an argumentative so and so), but surely having a realistic awareness of my own intelligence levels is compatible with having healthy self esteem? I accept myself as I am.

I think it's okay to be aware I'm not be the brightest, to be a slow learner (as I can be), as long as I accept myself with kindness and try to be the best person I can be in the ways I can.