I'm sorry things are so hard for you. Spiders bother my OCD, but I'm not really fearful of them. I think my issues were gradual, too.
How awful to lose a friend that way! May I ask what happened?
I will try to post a longer response later. I'm at dinner.
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Maven
If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted, I wish I had some ice cream.
Equal Rights Are Not Special Rights