I do not apologize for the pun. I will however, apologize if this gets to be too long. I’ll try to shorten it but honestly there’s a hundred thousand details I could get into so I’m going to try to stick to what’s most important.

I am a male in my lower 30s. I discovered my fetish around the age of eight. I know this because it happened shortly after I watched an undisclosed movie for the first time. My fetish is vore. Specifically, I like to fantasize plump women getting graphically and horrifically eaten by just about anything. Animals, monsters, redneck cannibals, zombies, etc. I don’t act this out. Never thought about it, never want to think about it, never will think about it. Or do it.

But what do I like to do? Write about it. Ever since I was a teen I liked writing weird scenarios about some woman I knew who was fat being eaten. But ever since I started writing these I’ve had issues with doing so. I started off feeling bad that what I found sexy in a woman, most would loathe about themselves. The other issue is that I’m so nice that I felt bad writing about any woman without their knowledge. I sometimes almost feel like I’m sexually abusing them. (Now, I have done so without their knowledge on occasion, one with an actual friend of mine, but they don’t know. Why I don’t particularly feel bad about this, I don’t know.)

Now you might think, why not just make someone up? I don’t know; I try that and I just don’t come up with the creative scenarios I do when I’m basing this on an actual person. And I’m about to make this even more confusing in that I have several plump female friends. They know my fetish, and they’d have no problem if I wrote about them being eaten for my own personal entertainment. And I’ve done so with a few of them.

But sometimes I’ll find (and sometimes even look for) chubby women online such as YouTube or other places and I’ll think of stories I could write of them. But I don’t even though I want to because, again, I feel like I’ll be sexually abusing them or that it will somehow be morally wrong. So either I don’t do it or I might (through alternate screennames or an email account that isn’t obviously me) ask. And yes I’ve even gotten some replies that they’re cool with it.

But do I even need permission? Am I just way overthinking this and that it is indeed okay? Should I just embrace what I am and type away? It’s not like I’m posting these. (God no…) I’m tempted to just write these without asking or without anyone knowing. Maybe I’ll feel more confident in myself and less bad?

Or would that be a bad thing? Let me know. Hell sometimes I feel like coming clean with my high school crush…

Oh, and one last note: can I get anyone to agree that Zara’s death in Jurassic World was the most awesome death in the series?