I don't blame you for being scared! I have a bipolar grown daughter and she only receives treatment or takes meds rarely. Most times she is a raging manic drunk human bulldozer and gets physically violent with me. I will only be around her if I have someone to protect me if she tries to attack. She doesn't live with me thank god. You should absolutely not feel guilty. You need to take care of yourself first. How old is your son? If he is an adult it is not unreasonable to refuse to let him live with you if he chooses to be unmedicated.