my psychotic break ("mania") was treated with involuntary shock. I don't remember the shock--I was sedated, and they did it the very night I was put into the hospital--but the break and the shock combined changed me in ways I may never fully appreciate.

On the plus side, I have my abilities back and my new personality is actually better, as best I can tell, than the old one. I probably won't ever remember most of my life before the shock.

So, I can relate to what you're experiencing, to a point. I'm glad you're receiving high quality, compassionate care.