Actually, it helps just getting this out! Being able to say I'm jealous I find people most often really resent others feeling jealous, and I've been ashamed whenever I've felt it.. Owning up to it now feels like I've taken away the shame!

I also recognise my thinking's faulty.. I feel I want the good things others have easily - but that's not how it goes for most people. Most people have (had) to work hard and go through a lot of cr* to get to a better place. I'm just not there yet - I'm walking my own path, but at least I'm doing it instead of burying my head in the sand