Keep coming here we will be supportive. He may never have hit you but his behavior was emotionally abusive. Tisha has a great idea of the letter. You could ask your sister if she lives near the hospital if he will allow you to talk to the doctor in charge of his case and tell the doctor his behavior so they can better help him. I was married to an abusive person and he too tried to get sympathy by playing the victim. Please tell those around you that any contact with him in person or by phone will only encourage him to stay stuck.

Stay strong, read the journals so you can see all the things you lived him for so many years.