lady2B,

I think the fact that you trust your therapist and want to try to do this work with him is extremely admirable. He sounds accomodating and willing to find a workable path with you. That is promising!!

It is entirely normal to lack childhood memories after such a horrific trauma.

(((lady2B))) I am very sorry about the loss of your daughter so young. Of course shutting down the bad memories makes it more difficult to have room for the good.

You aren't rambling at all. You're making perfect sense.

Please look around the forums and search the archives and you'll find that you are far from alone in what you experienced and how you've dealt with it.

I'm available for contact should you have any questions.

It is easy to care for another who has survived what no child/person should ever have to endure. It is in learning to open your heart to others in that situation that you might begin to open your heart to your own little girl inside who shut down and was silent for all these years.

I grieve for all that you lost by such a terrifying experience. I am proud for all that you have accomplished and survived through in order to be in this very place now.

You've survived and you're now facing the healing work. Many here can understand more than you might think.