My grandpa was in a recovery hospital. He hated it. So I called a bunch of relatives and we made a schedule. I was Wednesday. We'd each call on our day.
My dad I had to keep my distance from. He was a Jekkel and Hyde. One personality for when he was sober the other for his drunk self.
You mentioned your dad is an addict too.
Mine would sober up if he needed something. His 7 th wife hit him in the head with the phone. A big old fashioned land line phone. He had to have an operation on his eardrum.
Your dad lives far away too huh? Mine did too. But arranged to have operation in my state about 90 miles away.
But the thing you didn't say was why you feel the need for detachment.
During the years my dad stayed drunk from morning till night I had to stay away from him. He was an out of control nasty drunk.
So when I saw him in hospital it wasn't a good experience. I asked a girlfriend to go with me, I was afraid to be alone with him. Then she stayed and talked to him. He could be very charming.
I ran as fast as I could back to my car.
So when considering weather you want to see him, think of your mental health. I was extremely vulnerable to my fathers alcohol problem. It felt so bad to see what it did to him.
Even though my dad drank a quart of cutty sark whiskey a day he lived till almost his 80th birthday.
So Moose, do what you need to do for you too. He could outlive you or die tomorrow, we can't control those things.
I was troubled that I couldn't see my dad. But his alcoholism was too heavy for me. He died cutting himself shaving.