Yes I can relate. I have also explored possibly being assexual due to past trauma. I have been afraid of intimacy and have spent longer than you without a relationship. I went to the AVEN website but it didn't fit me. They are very accepting there though. There are different shades of being asexual which I don't understand. I do experience sexual attraction I just have fear of intimacy.

I am older now and am pretty comfortable being the way I am now. I belong to a singles group on facebook and it has helped me feel better about my situation and being single and all.