I was married for 8 eight years and during the last 3-4 years the marriage was unbearable so I left. Its been almost 3.5 years and the soon to be ex has finally agreed to sign a separation and commence the divorce.

Background:

She was highly dependent on me for everything, she didnt work and i was the bread winner. She was loyal and faithful but we grew up in different parts of the world and had different up bringing. There are no kids, we had a terrible sex life and she was emotionally unstable and and selfish. She always put me last and couldn't make me happy. She wasn't understanding at all and irrational.
She was an introvert. She isolated me from my friends, family and even co workers. She didnt have any family here and very little friends. She wanted to be with me and wanted me all to her self.

I was actually afraid of her most of the time, what i mean is that she would argue, fight, mistreat me most of the time for insignificant things so much that i was always walking on eggshells. Thats why i was afraid.

Now that i've been alone, i've dated other people that cared more about me than she had ever. I'm a pretty good catch and people gravitate to me but i'm finding something wrong with all of them. For some reason i think that life wasn't that bad with my ex. Most guys around me are afraid about their girl cheating on them or had a bad past or are in it for the wrong reasons but I didnt have any of those problems with her.

Now i have a fantastic girl that is almost everything I always wanted. Things are getting serious with her and I and i need to make a decision going forward.
She works, she's fun, and she's smart. I'm attracted to her and we would make a great team. I feel i won't ever love or be in love like i was with my ex.
All things point to having a great future with the current girlfriend but its not that great love story.

A little about the ex, she's been in isolation for the last 3.5 years. Everything i see her or need to discuss something she's crying. Its obvious is so hard for her. She doest go out or do anything. She hasn't moved on or improved herself.
I feel guilty for that, extremely guilty.

Since last week that her lawyer said she had to sign the papers I feel even worse. She said she doesn't want the divorce, didnt want to sign anything and is sorry for everything that she ever did to me. She said i'm a good person and wished things were different. I feel even more guilty now. Her saying she didnt appreciate me or that i was the best thing in her life and that she will never find someone like me ever is making me feel terrible about leaving her.

Now that she's signed the papers and we will be divorced in 2-3 months I'm feeling the worst that i have over the last 3.5 years.. I feel relief that she's signing and we are getting divorced but also feel guilty that I've left her the ex in a depressed state. I'm remember the things that i used love about her and good memories we had. I'm confused now more than ever

Am I missing her or just remember her because its coming to an end??