So it's important to remember that every relationship ends eventually, not just the therapeutic ones. It's not so much abandonment as the way of all things. It is not a reflection on you as a person that no relationship is forever. You and your T will part ways at some point, that is certain.

Of course when it's my life, I take it personally. But what I'm learning (in a slow, non-linear way) is how to be okay within me and how to be okay at relationships. Those are learnable things. You can, for example, learn how to grieve instead of living with dread.

Maybe embrace the inevitable? T won't be with you forever, but can help you figure out how to be there for yourself.